Does it need to be this hard and how do we live life differently?
Of course, the answers are not as straight forward as the questions! As humans, we often become trapped in patterns of behaviour that we have learned. Often we are stuck in a belief that we are capable of less than what we truly are. Moving through life making choices based on what we ‘should’ do, what others want for us or even based on very little conscious thought, we continue to react or do what we have always done. We often treat those around us in ways that prevent us from having what we desire. Change can be hard and also deeply satisfying when you make it happen.
It is important to note that being ‘emotional healthy’ does not mean we feel a certain euphoria all the time. It means that we let go of the ways of being that no longer work for us in creating the life we want. In turn, we open to learn how to go through life in ways that do. We establish a strong foundation of inner qualities that then help us ride the ups and downs that are bound to happen without letting them control us, define us or diminish our spirit. Instead, life can be a set of experiences that influence and stay with us as we choose them to be.
Since our emotions are a direct communication to our behaviour, when healthy, they give us critical information. We hear it and then choose how to respond.
The goal is to move away from expectations of happiness. These can be dependent on external (therefore ever changing and often out of our control) circumstances. Instead, we embrace feelings of strength, peace, resilience and self-worth. These internal qualities become accessible to us whenever we need them. Then, when we are faced with challenges, we feel triggered by an experience, things happen that are out of our control or choices need to be made, we have those inner resources to move forward with clarity and confidence.
Taking time to explore and tend to our emotional health has tremendous immediate and long term benefit. With our physical health, when we rid our bodies of limitations (e.g. poor eating habits) and focus on improving our abilities (e.g. exercise and nutrition) we open ourselves up to a renewed sense of well-being and enjoyment of life. So to, with our emotional health.
When we rid ourselves of the past experiences, behaviours and coping mechanisms that keep us stuck, our emotional health shifts. We open ourselves up to new levels of personal success, life satisfaction and healthy relationships.
The critical part for most of us it to understand that we all struggle at times and that making changes first takes our own realization that we need to do something different. It is like a personal acknowledgement that life is not panning out the way we had hoped and that we have the power to make a difference. We all have qualities within us that set us up for success.
Uncover them, let them grow and live a joyful life! Marny
Marny Elliott is a Nurtured Heart Approach® (NHA) Trainer, Coach and Emotional Health Therapist. She empowers parents, educators etc. to use this effective, heart centered approach to transform behaviour, build relationships and grow the Inner Wealth® of children. In addition, she provides holistic counselling to adults seeking to address defeating patterns and improve their emotional health. Please visit www.joywithin.ca, email email@example.com or call 250.218.8702.